‘It’s not you, it’s me’ is the gist of college student qualms with dating apps. Hook-up culture declines while young people search for genuine connection.
‘It’s not you, it’s me’ is the gist of college student qualms with dating apps. Hook-up culture declines while young people search for genuine connection.
It doesn’t help that these dating apps are all deeply enshittified. The free experience is kind of shitty, and the paid is suspect and expensive.
They could do more to focus on matching by something other than pictures. Shared interests, maybe.
They could do more to deal with bots, scams, and low effort users.
They could stop showing me people that live in Thailand. For some reason tinder likes to show me people that live 8000 miles away. Probably because they’re paying for it, but it makes the app worse for me.
I can’t speak to what college kids are up to these days. I’m old. I’ve never had a lot of luck “just meeting” people in real life, though. I always struggled with figuring out if someone was available and interested. I have several unpleasant memories of asking people out in college that I’d been spending time with, only for them to be like “sorry my boyfriend [you’ve never met and I never mentioned] and I are exclusive”. (Which may have been a lie to let me down gently, I guess.)
Also when you have a deal breaker or two, having that up front is helpful.
I know rejection is scary, but its not reallyna reflection of you rather then a reflection of someones preference. You could be a greek god and still get rejected.
Keep trying, but in the meantime also focus on you. Do what you need to do to love yourself, and then the rest will follow
I appreciate the kind words! I’m personally doing well dating wise. With one exception it’s all been people met through apps though.