Folks, I have finally figured it out.
Have a baby.
Since having a baby a week ago, all of a sudden everyone is willing to install a decent messaging app in order to receive pics of the baby.
We explained that we weren’t ready for images of our child to end up in the wrong hands via non-private apps. Another thing was telling them that the one single friend who had already got on board with this had already been recieving pics…
It’s been a conversation starter for many and I think seeing privacy from the point of view of a newborn has helped our family and friends understand it a bit more easily. Plus they’ve had to put up with it if they want any photos, so they will see it working firsthand.
So, if you want to have a baby, know that it can be a wonderful opportunity to help loved ones communicate more privately.
It also increases the sum total of love, community and compassion in the world and in your own life but that’s a conversation for another community :)
Edit: If anyone has good tips on how to share a little one’s journey more privately with those that care about them, please post them in the discussion.
i hope signal becomes the “go-to” app in near future in europe because i’m sick of using whatsapp
They should make the default settings on for keeping a username for connecting to each other and number hidden
yup but normies don’t care about safety and privacy
I discovered that it doesn’t work if the baby’s other parent is an avid Facebook user.
You know what you need to do
Join them on the darkside!
I have two kids. I asked people to use signal to send and receive the photos. Asking people to follow your requirements only works for the direct immediate communication. The photos of my kids were sent by the recipients I sent them to (over signal) to other members of the family, over gmail (unencrypted), WhatsApp, Instagram, etc. I learned that years after.
This was in direct violation of my express requests. When I confronted them, they played dumb.
So, not to be a buzzkill here OP, but if you did this to get more people to use your messenger of choice, good job, it worked. If you did this so the pics of your kids stayed on safe apps, don’t fool yourself. They didn’t.
That’s OK, I understand that unfortunately it’s only a matter of time until images of them end up somewhere I don’t want want them, either through ignorance or a difference in values. That’s the world we live in right now sadly. But hopefully I can delay and minimise it a bit, open a better channel of communication with a few friends and relatives and perhaps raise some awareness in the process.
I’m genuinely sorry to hear about your experience, especially with the pictures of them ending up on instagram. At least you were responsible as a parent and tried to do your best.
Its important to share and celebrate the birth of a child with your community. Yet another part of our lives that has been compromised by the degradation of our privacy unfortunately.
But hopefully I can delay and minimise it a bit, open a better channel of communication with a few friends and relatives and perhaps raise some awareness in the process.
Absolutely.
Yeah, my strategy is to not share pictures of my kids at all. I can hold my phone up in front of people’s face so they can look if they want, but that’s it.
My relatives hated this strategy, and I wasn’t the only one who suffered from it. They guilted me for it, but also guilted my parents and siblings. As if they are entitled to the details of my daughter.
People could handle (though they were vocally unhappy about it) is keeping the baby off Facebook. They could not handle me not sending pics on (Facebook) messenger, and they couldn’t handle me not telling me the birth weight.
Multiple boomers got very upset that I wanted to keep that information private.
Man that sounds really horrible. I’m sorry to hear your relatives were so unsupportive. I hope everyone gets along now.
My immediate family was all on board, so no big worries. It was the Grand parent level that thought I was being unreasonable with the privacy stuff. None of them ever be brought it up directly to me, just to my husband and my parents, so I could never really address it.
Could I simply purchase a baby?
Just be careful with the return policy, if your past the 60 day window it locks in a multi year contract.
Personally this would be the exact reason that would stop me from signing up for a new messaging service.
Yes, your baby is special and amazing. To you.
It’s what I did 5 years ago. All family and friends now on Signal.
Genius idea. Is there an app that reverses a vasectomy and twenty years of aging? But seriously, this idea has got legs, I love it. Congrats with your baby. Have you made a Facebook account for them yet?
Haha. Thanks :)
No, if they want a facebook account they will have to wait until they are 18!
I’m not arguing with your parenting style or saying you’re doing it wrong etc etc, I agree with it in theory but I’d like to share my younger sisters story.
My mum decided she couldn’t have social media until she was “old enough” to protect her, this however caused her to end up getting a secret phone and create secret social media accounts. This eventually led to her being cyber bullied by students at her school who’s parents were less cautious. But because she was doing all of this secretly as her mum had said no to social media, she didn’t feel like she could get the support she needed. Fortunately she had an older brother who could help her, but I couldn’t go to the school for her as I’m not her guardian.
I personally after this would lean into the world of not necessarily supervised social media usage, but educating and cautioning what it means to post on social media. How it will never go away and when it’s there, it’s there forever.
My sister fully understands this now and is doing alot better, but ultimately the damage is done.
I fully understand the point of view of no social media until 18, I just want you to be aware of potential consequences of being strict on it.
We explained that we weren’t ready for images of our child to end up in the wrong hands via non-private apps. Another thing was telling them that the one single friend who had already got on board with this had already been recieving pics…
This really is the best way. Once there’s a REASON for extra security, people understand and want to learn more. Once it’s installed, other day or day conversations can take place there
If you start off with low priority / day to day conversations, they aren’t as willing to put in the energy
This really is the best way. Once there’s a REASON for extra security, people understand and want to learn more.
No one cares. Nobody around you understands the security, the need for it, and the requirements. They will pretend, to see your kid. And then immediately and completely stop caring. It works for making people adopt your favourite messenger, yes. But nothing else.
That’s why my aunt and uncle finally got iPhones. They were missing out on iMessage and FaceTime with the grandkids and rest of the family making plans.
Wait, so the family chose to keep two people out of the loop until they caved and bought new hardware instead of adding one more app that would be common for everyone and give everyone the option to use whatever hardware they wanted?
Nobody uses third-party messaging apps here; it’s not just those two old people. There’s just no need. MMS has horrible quality videos and can’t be added and removed from a group chat and breaks functionality for everyone else in the chat.
That’d why Apple is getting sued by the DOJ among other reasons
DOJ needs to fuck off. Of people want to use an inferior product like android they’re free to, but nobody else should have to suffer for their bad decisions
Ok Tim Apple